How to Use Social Media to Alienate People

• Don’t say nice things about everyone.
• Don’t re-tweet that someone re-tweeted you.
• Don’t thank people for following.
• Don’t automatically follow people back.
• When someone follows you and they are obviously a hack – tell them to go away.
• Tell people to get off your website.
• Don’t be inviting.
• Point out hypocrisy and foolishness.
• Intimidate others.
• Stand up and speak loudly on divisive topics.
• Hold unpopular opinions and are upfront with them.
• Curse.
• Regular usage of sarcasm and wit.
• Ignore all social media strategies.
• Don’t use “Top Ten Ways to…” or reduce your writing to soundbites.

Essentially don’t act in a manner in which you are curating an idealized personification of yourself and instead are acting like a real person.

Anyone who conducts their online activities in the manner above is easily ten times more interesting and relevant than anyone else you’re interacting with online right now.

Follow them immediately.

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